Reflections on 2020: Kim Johnson

Hey friends, welcome to a new series that we are kicking off today during the season of Lent.
Each Wednesday we will be releasing an interview,
what we’re calling Reflections on 2020,
where we’ve asked somebody in the church or in maybe one case a person in the community to help
us through their lens look at the story of what it was like for them over the last year,
what their perspective was,
what their challenges were,
and maybe even what they learned from
that.
And the idea is not to be political,
it’s not to be medical,
it’s not to weigh in on
some of the hot buttons.
It’s just to say that on one hand,
we’ve all navigated this together,
but on the other
hand, each of us have our own story in the midst of that bigger picture,
and as we share
those stories, we get a chance to learn from one another.
Yeah, there’s a narrative opportunity to really hear how another person has experienced
this pandemic.
And what’s interesting about these conversations is that though there are definitely peculiarities
to different people’s experiences,
we are all unique,
and we’ve all had to deal with
slightly different challenges in the midst of this.
One of the things that’s striking as we go through these conversations is the persistence
of some through lines that you’ll find,
and people who have been reflecting and seeking
to be faithful in the midst of it.
And so what is going to really happen is on Wednesdays where we’ve normally had that sort
of conversational podcast, we’ll be having these interviews,
and largely these interviews
will stand on their own,
different signposts of different people’s experience.
And in the midst of a year in which there’s been so much talk about listening to one another
and honoring the voices of another,
I think this is a great opportunity,
a really concrete way that we can actually listen to one another,
not just the 16 words that get posted in Facebook
or Twitter or whatever.
This is a sustained opportunity to hear the voice of another person,
and that’s a gift.
And then on Sunday,
we’ll continue a more familiar kind of podcast format as we reflect
on some of the lessons that we’ve learned.
And they’ll draw from some of the themes you’re going to find in these interviews,
but they’re not necessarily going to be directly connected.
And I think the strength of that is we get to begin to look at this experience that we’ve
all had from different advantages,
because ultimately the invitation in this Lenten season,
if you were to throw yourself into this process with us,
is ultimately not just hearing the
voices of others and not just sort of reflecting on some larger themes of what it means.
Quite frankly, it’s to begin to process ourselves individually.
What has this meant for me and how can I begin to make sense of what this is going to mean
as it shapes me as a person into the future?
And I think that’s what makes this whole process, Clint,
really, really interesting and hopefully valuable.
Yeah, I think, Michael, as you and I worked on what will become the Sunday evening
conversations, we realized they’re more philosophical in nature.
And these Wednesday interviews are designed to have a more personal lens and come from a
smaller viewpoint, almost a single perspective in some cases,
as in today’s interview.
And what we then tried to do was to think about some of the variety or the interesting
vantage points and to identify what it might look like to talk to people who had a kind of rich experience,
in some ways that may be related to the rest of our experiences,
but in some ways, pretty unique, people inside the school,
for instance, people inside the medical community.
And as we begin today,
I think we try intentionally to start with one of what will be,
I think, the broadest, that is,
in other words, what is it like for an individual to be at
home with family, which is, to some extent,
wired into most of the experiences that we
have all had?
What is it like when society kind of
comes to a halt for a while and you find yourself
at home, in this case,
homeschooling children and managing personal time and family time
and all of the rest of that?
And so we begin today with what we hope will be kind of the most common vantage point that we’ll survey.
So today we are hosting Kim Johnson,
who’s a member here at First Presbyterian Church,
has a young family,
multiple kids in the elementary school,
and actually with a student about to
move up into the high school experience,
and that has been reshaped in some unique ways in
this season.
And so all of our conversation with Kim,
I think, struck me in the sense of a thoughtful
person trying to engage with what’s the best with kids,
different developmental ages,
with these, you know, real sort of boundary changing events happening and kids thriving within
routine and with safe boundaries.
And I think, you know, I was struck in our conversation with Kim of someone navigating
that as best as could possibly be done,
while recognizing all of the different hurdles that
sort of popped up as the year came along.
Yeah, you’ve lived through some of this,
Michael, I think those with young kids, you know,
I was in the home with a 19 year old,
she could get herself up,
she could make her own breakfast.
In fact, she made us dinner, things like that.
But as your situation and those with one with young children,
it’s very different how,
as you have to navigate,
do I try to make my children,
I don’t want them to be afraid,
but I want them to be aware of some of the things,
the sort of daily decision about they want
to go play with the neighbors because kids are home from school.
And are we going to do that?
And in Kim’s situation,
some specific health concerns for one of her children.
And then your homeschooling and you’re trying to navigate the teaching aspect and dealing
with various, you know,
the computer stuff and the Zoom stuff and all the technology that
kind of came along with that.
And I think it’s a really interesting story that I think a lot of people in some way lived
out in the midst of this.
If you have young kids at home,
I think there are parts of Kim’s reflections that are going
to feel very familiar.
There are probably some frustrations that you share.
There are probably some questions that you share.
And I think that will resonate.
If you didn’t do that,
then I think it gives us an opportunity for those of us who had a different experience.
It gives us an opportunity to kind of hear what that would have been like.
Well, I think we could tell you what Kim said or we could let you hear what Kim said.
So we’re going to go ahead and play this interview for you and hope that you find in it both
encouragement and also challenges.
We seek to put ourselves in the shoes of others in this season.
Yeah, and we are grateful for Kim being willing to come in and talk to us about it.
We’re grateful for you listening and we hope that it’s helpful.
I welcome.
We’re glad to have you join us for another one of our conversations that we’ve been going
on this Lenten season.
Today, we have the privilege of having Kim Johnson here as we get to discuss a little
bit of what it looks like from her vantage to enter into this 2020 season and all of the challenges therein.
So Kim, welcome.
Thanks for taking time to be with us today.
And I’m curious if you’re going to sort of go back in time,
you know, sort of go into the
time machine and reflect back into those very early days when we started to hear that things
were about to change.
What did that sort of feel like?
What was your experience in those days with your own work and ministry and parenting inside the home?
So we first heard about it when we were at state basketball.
So Brett was reffing and we started getting word there that things were going to be
shutting down.
They weren’t going to let spectators in.
Some of the Metro schools were shutting down.
So we kind of wondered,
will our schools be next?
So it was just a lot of confusion at first and being away from home.
It felt a little bit,
are we safe here with all these people in this arena?
Should we be going home?
So at first it was just a very uncertain.
But then once we got home and found out that school was going to shut down for a little bit,
it was kind of nice because we had been running around for a little bit.
So it was just nice to think,
OK, we’re all going to be at home and just be quiet.
And at that time,
I think we thought a couple of weeks we’ll be OK.
And so I remember we were watching Frozen 2 when we got the text on our phone.
So we told the kids,
you’re going to get to stay home for a little bit.
And it was all just I think everyone was kind of like,
oh, this should be nice.
We’ll just be quiet and stay home kind of like a snow day.
But then I think at the same time,
we weren’t quite sure,
well, what is that going to look
like?
So like I said,
just a little bit of uncertainty,
not really knowing and not quite sure how to navigate it.
Right.
Yeah.
And I remember thinking from our advantage with the girls thinking, OK,
yeah, an extended snowbreak was the idea that we had as well.
And we kind of thought, you know,
we’ll just let them play and hang out.
We didn’t really feel like we needed to worry about them getting any extra classes in or,
you know, we weren’t going to make them do math app or anything.
When did you guys start to get a sense like,
oh, we’re going to have to start digging in and
carrying some educational weight at home?
Well, I didn’t let my kids have too much of a break.
Having the teacher background and knowing that structure is good for my kids.
I that that next couple of days,
I had kind of a structure laid out.
So they didn’t have work yet from school,
but I have a couple of workbooks and things.
So I just said,
we’re going to just keep doing math.
We’re just going to keep on having some reading time.
And of course, they grumbled about it.
They all sat at the kitchen counter,
all three of them doing something,
doing a little bit
of work, and it was only, you know,
45 minutes to an hour.
But I just I wanted to kind of keep that going.
So we had a little bit of structure in the beginning.
And then once the school started sending out their their information of things that they
needed to do, that really helped because the boys are independent enough that they see
what they have to do and see it,
you know, kind of outlined for them.
Then they did it.
And so I I had to, you know,
encourage them to keep going with it.
But we had little card table set up in our office and they each had a card table and they
could set out all their things on it and had their laptops from school open.
So they knew,
you know, if they had a zoom meeting or they had an assignment,
then they just they worked on it.
So we kind of always knew that about 10 o’clock in the morning until lunch time,
they were going to work on their schoolwork.
So that’s kind of what we set up every day.
And then, of course, Alyssa wanted to do her schoolwork.
So I just made up things for her to do.
I’m curious, Kim, with your background,
I mean, obviously, there’s a little bit of
difference in terms of teaching and then teaching your kids at home in a place where
they generally don’t have to do some of that.
So walk us through that experience.
Did it go as you look back on it now?
Did it go pretty well?
Was it a it was a challenge?
Was it a battle?
Did it did it how did you navigate that stuff?
The education piece.
Right. It’s much harder to teach your own kids,
much harder.
And with Caleb,
his math level,
you know, being,
you know, last year was seventh grade
math.
So it was pre algebra, I believe.
I haven’t done that for a long time.
So when he had questions,
I didn’t really know how to help him.
So that was tricky.
So, you know,
we would try to figure it out together,
but I didn’t feel as helpful to him.
So with with his work,
it was a lot more independent.
So I didn’t have to worry as much with him.
With Colin,
I tried to help him with things.
And he and I,
but but it has a lot with trying to get him to do his work.
And so, yes, it was very tricky to teach my own kids.
Well, yeah, because you’re at home,
but you have to do school stuff,
but you’re not going
to school for a kid.
I think that’s,
you know, I just think that’s a tough spot to be in.
Right.
And they I mean,
I wasn’t grading them.
So I think Colin kind of figured that out that I could do the bare minimum,
get it done and push it off to the side,
you know.
So that’s tricky, too, is to, you know, kind of have them do their work,
but do it to the
best of their abilities.
I think they were kind of lax a little like,
I’m just going to get this done because I
have to do it,
but it might not be the best I can do.
Right.
Well, that coincides with the time where the entire school staff is trying to
pivot to an entirely new way to do what they do.
You know, that wasn’t scripted and wasn’t long.
They didn’t have a long time to plan it,
get ready for it.
That all kind of happened so quick.
So, yeah, it’s interesting, everybody managing.
What do you remember is just kind of within that is maybe the most challenging piece.
Was there is there something that sticks out as though this was the thing that we battled
the most?
I think it was probably after a couple of weeks of it.
I think the kids just were done with doing that online work or the at-home work and they
didn’t want to do it anymore.
So I think that was the tricky thing was trying to motivate them and encourage them without
really knowing were they going back to school?
Were they not?
Like we didn’t know what the end result was going to look like yet.
And so it was tricky on how to get them to be motivated for the next whatever was going
to happen with school.
And so I could tell that they were just losing their losing interest in it.
And I didn’t know how to keep them going.
The school did a fantastic job with keeping Zoom meetings with their teachers and with their classmates.
And, you know, that was really nice because I felt like that helped once they saw their
teachers, saw some of their classmates that kind of encouraged them a little bit more.
But otherwise, when they’re all by themselves,
I think they just lost the interest of school.
And that was tricky because you are at home.
So it’s not the school setting.
And even if I tried to make it look like a school setting,
it’s not the same thing.
And so it was tough.
And of course, you know, they have the PS4 downstairs.
So they, you know, they want to get this done so they can go work or go play.
And that was tricky,
too, to, you know, we just had to keep that structure and keep it
where this is the only time you get to play that and this is the time you do school and,
you know, keep it separated.
So I think that was a tricky thing.
And then we didn’t know if we could really leave the house.
And that was hard, too, to know,
can we go outside and play or should we just be staying inside?
And after those couple of weeks,
we realized, you know, we can go to do nature hikes or nature walks.
And so the Nature Center had put out some different things of here’s a good nature hike
place.
Here’s another good nature hike place.
So I said to the kids,
let’s do that once a day.
Let’s go try to find some place around our community that we’ve never gone before.
And every day after school work,
we’re going to go out.
And we did it and we kind of explored different places.
And we would be yelling at each other at home and then we’d go do that.
And it was like,
oh, we all could breathe being outside,
open air, open fields, let our dog run.
And then we could all come back home again for lunch and be like,
okay, we’re good again.
So you know, that’s amazing because my recollection is in mid spring when it got nice enough to
be outside regularly.
I don’t think I’ve ever seen trails, the parks,
some of those places,
not the playgrounds because those got roped off,
but I don’t think I’ve ever seen some of those places
busier.
So I think lots of people were kind of getting on to that that we got to get away
from.
We got to spread out a little bit.
How anxious,
maybe hard to speak and kids are different like anyone else.
Did your kids have any anxiety other than the frustration of school?
Did they have any sense of being worried about the whole thing?
Do you have a sense of where they were at in that?
Yes and no, I think it was they just didn’t quite know what to expect and didn’t know
what the sickness looked like at that time.
And so I think it was just more that they were unsure of it.
So I don’t know if they were really anxious.
I’m an anxious person,
so I think sometimes they could sense that I was feeling anxious
and kind of feed off of that.
And Colin has some breathing issues with asthma with his allergies.
And so I was feeling anxious about him.
Respiratory,
right. And I think they could pick up on that so that I think they got a little nervous.
So knowing all that,
I mean, we were pretty strict with them and what we were allowing
our family to do during that time.
And so so I think they picked up on my anxiety a little bit,
but they were never.
I mean, it wasn’t that they weren’t sleeping at night or worried in that sense.
We just tried to.
But they were aware.
They were definitely aware.
Maybe not Alyssa, but the boys definitely were.
She just knew there were bad germs around.
So it was interesting.
You mentioned how important the Zoom calls were of having friends.
And I wonder when you think back to that spring going into summer season,
what would you say you watched happen relationally with the kids?
Were they feeling disconnected from friends?
How did you see that play itself out?
They definitely miss their friends.
And they don’t have or at that time,
they didn’t have phones.
So they didn’t have a way to communicate with their friends.
So no text message.
They didn’t have anything.
And so they, I think, really missed talking and being around their peers.
The Zoom calls did help,
but not all the kids got on those Zoom calls.
So they did still miss their friends.
So when they did get to talk to their friends was through the PS4.
They could play video games while talking on their headset with their friends.
And I could tell a huge difference once they were able to do that,
just to be able to talk that way.
And that seemed hate to say that the PS4 saved them during that time.
But that was,
you know, just being able to talk to their friends,
play with them virtually.
That really helped them.
Yeah, sure.
Because they’re also losing,
you know, Little League and some of those those places where they just naturally intersect with.
Right.
With their peers.
And they did see,
you know, there were some kids in the neighborhood
that were playing together.
And so they they wanted to do that.
And I think, you know, when the weather did get nice and,
you know, kids were out,
they didn’t understand.
Like I said, we were a little more strict because we were worried about Colin.
They didn’t really get,
well, why can’t I go play?
Why can’t we go do that?
So that was tricky,
too, to, you know,
tell them that they couldn’t at that time.
So did you ever come to a moment when you and Brett sat down and said, OK, summer?
It’s coming.
We need a game plan.
I mean, did that conversation happen or was it a series?
What did that look like?
Yes, we kept thinking summer is going to be better.
Everything’s going to be better in the summertime.
We’re going to be able to be out.
Things are going to start to go back to normal.
We just thought summer was going to be the positive time.
And along with that was baseball.
Our kids love baseball.
That’s their favorite sport.
So we thought, is there going to be baseball?
You know, we didn’t know because Little League had gone canceled,
but there’s some travel team.
And so we didn’t know,
will that happen or not?
And we thought that would be good for the kids.
So it was it was very, you know,
confusing.
But yeah, we kept thinking, oh, summer will be better.
And so we we kind of set up,
you know, in the summertime, we were trying to think,
how can we do this with the kids?
You know, that we can let them be kids and let them have fun in the summer,
but yet be safe.
So I mean, it was tricky.
I think in the summertime,
we started allowing them to play with their
with the neighborhood kids,
but they had to stay outside.
They couldn’t go inside homes.
That was part of our rule.
So they played with one other family.
And that really helped,
I must say, just to be for them to be able
to play outside with their friends.
And then we did cancel our family vacation for the summer.
We thought we’re not going to try to mess with that.
But other than that,
you know, we just kind of went day by day.
And made decisions day by day,
too, if it was going to be smart to do or, you know,
tell the kids no.
So it was it was not right away,
as I remember it.
But at some point.
What are we probably now early summer,
the mask thing mid summer?
What’s that like?
So now in addition,
you’re trying to get mask on little ones
and kids in general that are fidgety and aren’t going to love that look.
So how did that go?
Well, my mom made a bunch of masks for us.
So she had a lot of different patterns that they could choose from.
So they kind of thought that was fun.
So then we said,
you know, you wear your mask when we go inside places.
But we didn’t go inside anywhere.
We did all our grocery shopping online.
We didn’t really go in places.
So they they didn’t have to wear their masks very often.
So that didn’t seem to be an issue,
but none of them really complained.
They knew, you know, if we want to go do something,
we have to wear it.
That’s how it’s going to be.
So they never really had issues with the mask.
They didn’t seem bothered by it at all.
I do remember the boys showed pigs at the fair and that was in July.
And we did tell them to wear their masks to show,
even though it’s open air,
you know, it’s kind of an open building.
We told them to because we,
you know, we just thought it was the safe thing to do.
And no one else did.
And I remember thinking this will be a true test to see how the kids handle this.
And they kept them on.
They questioned it and wondered,
but they did.
And like I said,
they were about the only ones that did,
but they did it.
So I was grateful that they listened and they didn’t seem bothered by it.
But, you know,
that was the tricky thing of they would ask us,
why do we have to
wear it?
But no one else does.
And, you know, it was at that time where it wasn’t quite mandated yet.
And so that was rough.
Yeah, I do think one of the threads of this conversation with different people has
been that while it was nice to have some freedom,
what that creates is a constant
string of decision making.
Do we do this?
Do we not do this?
Do we wear a mask?
Do we not wear a mask?
Do I go to that event?
Do I not?
And rather than that being taken away from us,
it becomes something we have
to do, you know, multiple times a day.
And several people have commented on the kind of on one hand benefit that is,
but on the other hand, how stress producing that also can be because now you’re just
constantly navigating those decisions.
Right.
Yeah.
So we we have the summer sounds like you’re making decisions as we get through.
And of course, we get to what was for, I think,
a lot of young families,
if not all young families, that looming black hole,
which would be the fall.
Yeah.
Well, we’ve had conversations with school administrators and that was the same
there.
What are we going to do?
So was there was that a pretty clear cut decision for you guys or was that more
fraught?
Was there was it tough to know what to do in the fall as you’re thinking
about going back to school and what’s the right thing and all that kind of thing?
Right.
I think it was kind of waiting to see what the school’s plan was.
I think we were just waiting to hear the information.
We weren’t a yes or no right off the start.
I mean,
you’re just kind of questioning it,
but wanting to see what the plan was.
The boys were always and Alyssa because this was our preschool year.
It was I’m going to school.
We’re going to be around our friends.
I mean, they wanted it so bad.
And so I knew if we had the choice,
they would always choose to be in with their
friends.
That’s that’s what they all wanted.
And so Brett and I just wanted to hear what’s the school’s plan.
Do we feel comfortable with it?
Then will we want to have the kids go?
So I think we didn’t quite make that yes or no,
or we weren’t, you know,
for sure, no, or for sure.
Yes, we just waited to see all the information.
And we thought the schools did an amazing job with their plan.
We agreed with everything.
We were grateful for everything that they were trying to do.
And so it felt very comfortable to have the kids go back to school.
I knew they needed it emotionally.
So for that reason,
even with the risk of me being a little nervous about Colin,
I knew for their mental health,
they needed to be in school,
that it would only
be positive for them.
So I think Alyssa was a little more that I was a little more nervous about.
And I didn’t make a decision up until maybe I think it was probably a week
before school started for her.
So we had signed the boys up for school.
And with her, I thought, you know, she’s four.
She’s a young four.
So she doesn’t technically need to go to school.
And I didn’t know that preschool age.
Are they going to wear their masks?
Are they going to be touching?
You know, is it going to be worth it?
Is it I just didn’t I wasn’t quite sure what I wanted to do with her.
And then again, like I said, we the school did such a great job of their plan.
And we went in and saw how they were going to handle the preschoolers too.
And we thought it’ll be OK.
So by then, I think we were also far enough long.
We had learned a little more.
We had gotten a little more information in terms of right kids and that whole
demographic and risk levels and things.
And I think some of that’s present by that point that we didn’t know early on
and probably couldn’t have known.
But that must help.
I mean, it must be it must be a factor for people.
I think that probably a lot of people by that point had kind of said,
OK, this this is a manageable type of risk.
Right.
And kids weren’t getting as sick.
And so that did make us feel a little bit better knowing that it’ll be OK.
It was more that if they’re exposed to someone,
you know, that was the question
of if they’re exposed and need to be home for two weeks.
And, you know, that was kind of what is that going to look like for us as a family?
And what would that how would that affect Brett with work?
And so it was almost that you have to kind of have that plan that if they are exposed
to something, where do they stay in the house?
And then do we separate so Brett can keep going to work?
And, you know, that was more of the question.
But again, with how the school handled the distancing and the masks and everything,
it ended up just being,
you know,
they did a good job.
It all worked out very well.
And I have friends who told me,
I mean, they’re one of my college friends.
Her daughter was quarantined in that first month of school two different times.
And so the first beginning of school,
she had missed five weeks of school already.
And so I just think,
OK, I’m very grateful with how our school handled everything.
So I think a lot of people would be able to say that.
I think, you know, they had some incredible challenges,
but I think they put a lot of
thought into them.
And again, you’re never going to get everything perfect on your
first go round.
But the ability for parents like yourself to have their kids back in
school, I think in a lot of ways is a real gift to the community,
not not just for
mental health, which I think it is for kids and parents,
but also for people not
figuring out how to figure out daycare and being able to go back to work and some of
those other other things that come with the disruption.
Right.
So I’m curious, we’ve been through the first full semester,
made it through Christmas break.
Now we’re into the next part of school.
What would you say is to find this school year for the kids?
Has it been substantially different?
Has it been essentially the same?
I mean, how would you sort of tease out what school has looked like in covid times?
I think it’s been different for the kids.
I know Caleb is over at the Sami Center.
They have the eighth graders there to kind of separate kids to keep numbers down.
And that’s been he’s been fine with it.
He actually likes being part of the high school building.
But it’s his last year of middle school.
So as a mom,
I just think, oh, it’s it’s frustrating that you can’t be that
the oldest in the building kind of thing.
So that’s been different.
I think the masks they don’t even know,
Colin told me, I don’t even know when it’s on
anymore.
So that hasn’t been too much of a challenge for them.
Some of the sports things,
Caleb’s basketball season ended up just being a couple
weeks total because they ended up shutting down sports there for a little bit.
So some of those things have been a little challenging.
But other than that,
all in all, it seems like school’s pretty normal.
I think it’s just a new normal,
I guess they are.
And they the kids just seem to pick up on that,
like this is how it is this year.
And it’s OK.
So they’ve all handled it really well.
But it’s you know, there’s definitely differences.
I think there’s a sense in which I’m just wondering out loud here,
is there a sense in
which it’s harder for to change as parents than it is as kids?
Do you think they take some of this as natural matter,
of course, and maybe we
internalize it differently?
I think so.
I think kids can handle change so much better than we can.
I think they they tend to go with the flow.
And I feel like,
you know, I look at it like I said with Caleb’s and I think,
oh, that’s such a bummer.
He’s going to miss out on being an eighth grader in the middle school.
And he’s looking at it more as this is great.
I’m in the high school next year.
I’ll be here.
So now I’m even more comfortable with the high school.
It’s fun to be part of just our own little area,
you know, with our friends.
And so he you know,
the kids seem to find the positives a little bit easier,
I feel, than the adults, at least for me.
I tend to go towards the negative first and then realize,
OK, maybe it’s not so bad.
So so it helps to see it from the kids perspective a little bit.
Along those lines, Kim, you made reference to maybe being a person that
carries some anxiety or at least ties into anxiety.
You know, there has been,
I think, by any reasonable standard,
a lot of opportunity for anxiety in the last year.
So and not only that,
but it happens for people at a time where some of the ways
we’ve tended to manage it have also been taken away.
And so going out,
taking vacation, some of the things that we use to kind of buffer that.
We’ve had this conversation, too.
So where how has that gone for you?
What what did you how did you manage that in that time again?
Looking at kids, looking at I don’t have much time to myself now because they’re
with me all day and they’re frustrated that I’m making them do math.
And just just in the midst of all of that,
what what does managing anxiety
look like for you during that whole process?
I think it was important for all of us to have our own space,
even within our house.
So we all needed to be alone at some point in time during the day.
And luckily, we could each have a,
you know, a space to go to when things
felt overwhelming and just be alone.
And I think the kids understood that I needed that time,
too.
And luckily, with the ages that the boys are,
they can watch Alyssa for me.
So there were times that they would watch her and I’d go for a run outside
and just to have that little time away.
It really helped a lot.
So I just felt like if I had to,
you know, just go to my room
and read my book for a little bit with the door closed.
I think, you know, the kids understood I needed that time.
And,
you know, just to be away and not hear voices and see people.
It was I feel like that was what was helpful.
Just being able to kind of call time out when you needed it
and fill that space in with something else.
Yes.
Yeah, that’s
that’s good.
That’s good.
Then in in regard to
the the overall experience,
you know, one of the things we’ve heard is,
I mean, clearly nothing is all bad,
right?
I mean, nothing is without its upside.
So as you look back now,
is there anything that you think 2020
brought you that was a positive?
Is there anything you look back and you say,
you know, maybe that initial time of we did get two weeks to just kind of hunt her down
and put puzzles together or whatever that was.
But is there anything you identify as a positive throughout that experience?
I think it was nice to be together as a family.
I think the kids got closer,
you know, just to be able to spend that time.
But I really think and even today,
I feel as though for all of us, it’s that
almost that live for the moment
because you don’t know what tomorrow is going to bring.
And, you know, we tell the kids that a lot because even with their sports,
enjoy that you’re playing today because tomorrow could get shut down
because we knew that,
you know, being at school and then all of a sudden it shut down.
And then you realize all that you took for granted because you don’t have it.
So I feel like for all of us, it’s that
enjoy what you have today because tomorrow it might not be there.
And sometimes that got a little heavy to think about for all of us.
And a little overwhelming,
but yet there’s something great about that,
too, because even with the kids activities now,
you know, I feel like they
they enjoy it a little bit more knowing that,
OK, I get to play basketball right now.
I get to go to a swim meet right now.
And I didn’t know if I was going to get that chance to do it.
So I’m going to give it my all.
You know, so it’s just that sense of being grateful,
being grateful for what you do have.
Is there,
Kim, a practice or lesson or thing that you kind of would hope to preserve
going into the future,
something that you hope you carry with you out of this experience?
I think it’s that being not so busy is a good thing,
you know, to when we I think the structure
is great.
I think our kids activities are wonderful,
but there’s something about just
taking some time as a family and just unwinding,
you know, just shut the phones off,
shut the TVs off and go for those nature walks and just enjoy together time.
And, you know, I just feel like we we learned a lot about each other through this time and
being able to enjoy each other and being together.
So then just one other aspect, you know,
not only do you take care of the family,
but you have had this connection to
reaching out to people,
a ministry to those who have been in difficult pregnancy situations.
And as something like that gets obviously harder to do.
What’s it like losing that that service component,
that thing that, you know, compelled to see if you can reach out and positively affect other people’s lives.
And then at the same time,
all this other stuff is happening,
you’re also losing that opportunity.
Yeah, it’s you know, it’s tricky because people are still suffering,
but you don’t
maybe know because you’re you’re losing that connection.
And so knowing that it’s still out
there, but yet you’re not able to help at that time is frustrating.
And it’s,
it is tricky, but yet,
you know, maybe it’s kind of made me wonder,
is there a better way to reach out then?
Is there a better way to let people know that they can get help?
So yeah, you just feel a little bit more
helpless, I guess, and unsure of how to help.
Yeah, I think we’ve had some of that experience,
you know, to get a call that someone’s in the hospital without being able to actually respond,
it raises the question,
well, what else can we do?
And how can we,
without just stepping back and
saying, sorry, can’t, you know,
how else can we adapt to try and do some of that work in these
restricted times?
I think that’s not an easy question.
Right.
And I think it’s, you know,
what’s neat about that then is also trying to figure out different partnerships.
And I’ve been exploring that a lot these last few months is,
if I want to help women and families,
what other partnerships are available,
you know, during these crazy times,
but also just for the future.
And it’s just made me realize that there’s,
there’s a lot of different ways that
you can still help people without being able to be the person directly to help.
And so I think,
you know, being able to find different partnerships,
different relationships to get to there.
It’s tricky, but I think it’s,
it’s kind of neat to find those relationships.
Yeah, in a strange way, those challenges are also opportunities,
they do push you to figure out some new patterns.
And then maybe just end on kind of an up note.
When this,
whenever it is, when, when we’re at a point where we all feel pretty
confident and pretty comfortable again,
what does, what’s day one look like for the job?
So what are you guys most looking forward to?
Is that, is that a family trip?
Is that
baseball game?
What are you looking forward to getting back to?
I think first,
I want to hug my parents.
It’s, you know, we’ve kept our distance from our parents and I think that’s really tough.
So I want to give them a hug and I want to see my sister and her family,
my brother and his family,
and just be able to be together without feeling like we’ve got to keep
a little distance and feel awkward.
So I think it’s that family time
that we’ve missed out on.
That’s really, that’s really nice that the thing you miss isn’t a thing at all.
It’s, it’s the connection with other people.
Yeah. Yeah.
What do the boys want to do?
Play with friends, birthday party.
They want to go on a big trip.
Yeah.
And they keep asking us.
I mean,
they want to get on an airplane and go somewhere.
And so they want to do some kind of
trip.
So I don’t know if it’ll happen or not.
Travel may, travel may come back in a big way.
Yeah.
Well, Kim, thanks for taking the time and sharing your story and being
willing to offer this opportunity for us to share with you.
So thanks.